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Neend jab b hame agosh me leti hai,
Aapka chehra nigaho me bas jata hai ekdam se hamari
ankhe khul jati hain Dil se bas ek awaz aati h.....MUMMY MUMMY BHOOT...
__________________________________________
Sardar ko sapne me kisi ladki ne chappal mari.... 2 din tak sardar apne 'BANK' nahi gaya ? kyuki bank me likha tha'hum aapke sapno ko hakikat me badal dange.
_______________________________________
Teacher:Santa 1 story sunao wid moral
Santa:Me uske ghar gya vo so rha tha
Fir vo mere ghar aya to main so rha tha
Moral: Jaisi Karni Vaisi Bharni
___________________________________________
.***. * 1 * .***.
ye lo 1/- ka coin & send me sms..
kanjusi ki bhi koi had hoti he..
or khabardar is 1 Rs. se toffe kharidi to..!
________________________________________
Macchar Bola Insan Se-Mat Maaro Hume Jaan Se,
Jung Chied Jaayegi ,Dushmani Badh Jayegi Maana Aap Me Junoon Hai,
Magar Humari Rago Me Bhi Aapka Hi Khoon h.
____________________________________________
1 Admi ko heart ki bimari thi.
Doctor ne namak na khane ki salah di..
Uski biwi hamesha uska khayal rakhne lgi..
Wo admi b bahot sawdhani rkhne laga..
Samay pe khana,sona,uthna,
Dr ki batai exercise karna, khane me namak bilkul na lena..
Regular or samay pe dawayi lena..
Par achanak 1 din subah wo admi bathroom k darwaje pe mara hua mila..
Sab hairan the ki itni sawdhani ke baad aisa kaise ho gya..?
Postmartam ki report aayi to pataa chala...
.
.
.
Uske Toothpaste me 'Namak' tha..
Kya aapke toothpaste me namak h...?:
______________________________________
H
A
AA A A A A A A A AA
AA A A
A
A
Aa
Aaa
Aaaa
HAAanchii.!!
SORRY!
Mosam kharab he.
Apna khyal rakhna .!...
_____________________________
Sardar n apni BHABHI ko Jaan Se Maar diya.
Logo n Pucha q Mara.?
Sardar-Mai jb b apne dosto se Puchta tha Ki Kis Se baat kr rhe ho Wo yhi kehte teri BHABHI Se..
_____________________________________
1 Sharabi Mar Rha Tha To Bhagwan PrakaT Hue aur Bole- Koi Antim ichcha?
Sharabi- Prabhu.. Agli Baar Aankh Chahe 1 Hi Dena, Par Liver 4 Dena..
__________________________________________
Santa:EK kala bulb dena.
Shopkeeper:BHAI sahab Kale bulb ka kya kroge?
Santa:O YAR dopahar me andhera krke sone ka maza hi kuch Aur hai...gm
____________________________________
Santa ki roti par se chuha gujar gaya
Snta: Ab me ye roti nhi khaunga
Banta: Kha le beta chuhe ne konsi chappale pahni hui thi
___________________________________
DHINCHAK: Shortcut Propose:-
Boy : Kya Mai Aap ka Address Jaan Sakta Hu?
Girl : Q
Boy :Ek Din Baraat Jo Leker Aani Hai
_________________________________
"Chuho" ka aatank to dekho.
h mG j pT j mA d j jtaJ m tj tg a C h hO tP
sara SMS kutar diya,varna bahut kuch likha tha aapki Tareef me..
___________________________________
Judwa bache Apne Kamre Me Bethe The,
1 Hans k Lot Pot ho Rha tha,
2nd Udaas Tha.
Baap:-Tum itna Q Hans Rhe Ho?
Beta-Mummy ne Dono baar isi ko Nehla Diya.
__________________________________________
SENDI ik ped pe chada.
Bandar ne pucha-Upar kyon aaya.
SENDI-Seb khane.
Bandar-Yeh aam ka ped hai.
SENDI-Pata hai seb sath laya hoon.
______________________________________
Boy to girl:Likhe jo KHAT tujhe
woh teri YAD me,
sare padh liye papa ne RAAT me,
sawera jab hua to JUTE pad gye
wo"FANAA"wale baal "GHAJNI" me badal gye.
_____________________________________
Limit of caring..
1 cheeti hathi k upar bethi thi ki ekdum se 1 najuk sa pull aya to cheeti boli..
'Janu cross kar loge ya main utru'..?
_____________________________________
Hrithik tried to compete with Rajnikant in dance..
Result: he is on wheel chair in guzaarish..!
______________________________________
In INDIA
70% of Girls Name Ends in"A"
20% of Girls Name Ends in"I"
If U Have Any Doubt Check With Ur Friend's Name
Wat a great research?
_____________________________________
1 Bar Gandhi Ji k Sar Pe 10 Baal Aaye...
Wo Naai k Pas Gaye Naai Ne Gusse Me Pucha...
CUT karu & ya
COUNT karu ?
Bapu Vinamrta Se Bole...
.
COLOUR kar Beta !!!
________________________________
Boss-Tum itne chote chote kapde Q phanti ho?
Secretry-kya karu sir itni salary me itne hi chote kapde aate h.
Boss-chalo aj se salary band..!!
____________________________
{3+3 = 8 }
Ye Kaise Hua ?
Sochiye !
Ha Ha Sochiye !
Dimagh Pe Zor Daliye!
Shabash.!
Or Sochye!
Nhi Pta?
Mai Bataun Kaise Hua.
GALTI se.
____________________________________
Girl-Ladka kaisa he?
Pandit-Ladka acha he, Enginering kiya he dikhne me film ka HERO lagta hai
Girl-Kaun si film ka hero?
PEEPLI LIVE
___________________________________
A girl in a card shop
Girl:Aisa Greeting Card hai kya jisme likha ho
"Tum hi mera pehla pyar ho"
Shopkepr:Hai
Girl:Thik hai 10 de do..
____________________________________
_,--(*)-=:___/|
(._0___:="''""\| I:I:I
Apka SMS Lane K Liye Apna Private Helicopter Bheja hai
Itna Kharcha Kiya h Mene,Ab 2-4 Msg to Bhej do.
____________________________________________
Girl :- Meri mummy ko tum bahut pasand aaye h
SENDI(sharmatehuye)
:Kuch bhi ho mai shaadi tumse he karunga
aunty se kehna mujhe bhool jaye.
_________________________________________
Boy prpoz 2 grl:Ye Raat,Ye subah,ye Hawa,Ye Chand,Ye Ghatayen,Ye Nadia,Ye Kinare
Girl:Saale Propose Kr Rha H Ya Environmental Study padha rha hai. . .?
_______________________________
What happens when a Sardarni delivers twins?
? ?
? ?
? ?
? ?
The Sardar does not sleep whole night thinking who is the father of second child!
________________________________________
Ali k 4 bache hue.Naam rakhe yusuf ali,aasif ali,asraf ali,musaraf ali fir 5va or 6ta bacha hua to. Ali ki bivi ne unke naam rakhe...
BAS-KAR ALI
REHAM KAR ALI.
_______________________________________
)Ek pagal dusre pagal se-main tumko itni zor se thappad maruga k delhi jakar giro ge...dusra pagal-zara ahista marna mujhe gaziabad main kuch kaam hai..
_________________________________________________
Boy:Me 5 Yrs Ka Hu,
Aur Tum?
Girl:Me 3 Yrs Ki Hu.Boy:Toh Fir Chal Na,
Shrmana Kya?
Girl : Kanha..??
?
?
?
?
?
?
Boy-Polio Ki Dva Pine.!
_________________________________________
Medam boy se- kahan h copy
kahan h pen?
boy- jabse tumhe dekha kya copy kya pen?
Tare mast-mast 2 nain
mere dil ka le gye chen
gayab h copy or kho gye pen!!
____________________________
Joke
Pehla Gadha-Malik Mujhe Maarta Hai, Doosra-To Bhag Jaa.
Pehla-Nahi Malik Ki Beti Roti Hai To Vo Kehta Hai Teri Shadi Kisi Gadhe Se Hi Karvaunga.
____________________________________
I Called U 5 Times...
But D Line was Busy,
So Pls Come
In ur balcony,
I'm
Outside
ur Home.
____________________________
1 Gadhe ne sardar ko lat mari.Sardar uske piche bhaga to raste me ZEBRA mila.Sardar usko lat mar k bola" Sale Night-Dress pahen k ullu banata hai"
_____________________________________
3 sardar picnic par gae whan ja kr yad aya k pepsi to ghar bhul gye Decide kia k sab se chota sardar ja kr pepsi le aye,
sardar:Main is shart par jata hu k tum mere ane tk smose nhi khaoge
Dono ne kaha thik hai
1 din guzr gya sardar ni aya
2 din guzr gae
2no ne socha k ab smose kha lne chahye
Jse hi smosa uthaya chota sardar ped k piche se nikal k bola.
Aise karoge to main nahi jaunga...
I'm"moon"
I Just Came 2 Say U....
''GOOD NIGHT''
_________________________________
A Sardar In a B.E. Campus Interview : Hw does an electric motor run?
Sardar: dhuurrrrr..rr Interviewer Shouts : STOP IT ! Sardar : dhurr dhp dup dup dup.
_____________________________
Plz msg me only between these timings:..
6am-11:59am, 12pm-3:59pm,
4pm-7:59pm,
8pm-5:59am.
remaining time I'm BUSY very seriously... pdai krni pdti h..;-)
_____________________________________
Mujhse kya galti ho gai?
Why r u avoidng me?
Atleast week mai 1 bar to yaad kar liya karo
Ur behavior is hurting me?
with love..
from-
ur bath Soap!
______________________________________
CID enters SOUTH:
Rajnikant bole "YENNA RASCALA, MIND IT"
wah wah
Rajnikant bole "YENNA RASCALA MIND IT"
ACP-Abhijeet, lash yhi kahi h,FIND IT!!...:-
------------------------------------------------------------
This is to formally announce
that I have started accepting diwali gifts by
CASH, CHEQUES & CREDIT CARD etc.
To avoid last day rush, Send now!
---------------------------------------------------------------
Your Eyes.. Patakha.
Your Smile.. Roket.
Your Body.. Fuljhari.
Your Style.. Anaar.
Your Personality..Bomb.
ab bolo MSg.karoge ya Machis jalaun..?
_____________________________________
Sardar: ye TV ka rate Kya hai?
Salesman: 1 lakh rupees.
Sardar: why anythin Special?
Sal: Light chali gayi to Automatic off ho Jayega.
Sardar: oho, pack it.
_______________________________
Ramlila se Hanuman tha Farar,Roll k liye fit kiya 1 Sardar.Sardar tha bahut hi kamal, Ped se Chalang mar k bola-Jo bole so Nlhal, Sita darling Sastriya kaal.
_____________________________________________
Yaar 1ladki muje bahut tang kr rhi h
pta nhi usko mera no. kaha se mila
jab b kisi ko cal kro bech me aakr khti h
PLZ RECHARGE UR ACCOUNT
______________________________________________
Santa Ko Electric Chair Par Bitha Kar Electric Curent Se Maut Ki Saza Sunai.
jailer-Akhri Khwahish Kya Hai?
Santa-Mujhe Dar Lag Raha Hai Mera Hath PakAd lo.
____________________________________________________
Sardar fixed his marriage on 2nd march.
He sent invitation 2 his friends like this
"Marriage is on march 2nd.
Plz come on 1st night. we all will enjoy"...
________________________________
Santa tharmos le k picnic pe gaya. Santa:Is me thandi cheez thandi,
or garm cheez garm rhti h
Banta:Tum is me kya laye ho?
Santa:4 kulfi aur 2 cup Chai.
_____________________________
Ek raat 2 baje bahut tez barish ho rahi thi.
santa ne ek aadmi ke ghar ka darwaza khatkaya aur puchha Dhakka laga doge kya?please.
Aadmi neend me tha isiliye mana kar ke andar aa gaya par use guilty feel hui.socha barish me koi meri madad na karta to?
Woh utha aur bahar jakar bola-santa kya tumhe abhi dhakke ki zarurat hai?
Awaz aayi -HAAN.
Aadmi:-Thik hai santa, tum ho kahan?
Santa bola "YAHAN GARDEN ME JHULE PAR" :-)
________________________________
#Doctor to Santa: #Aapki ek kidney fail ho gayi hai.
#Santa pehle to bahut roya, Fir aansu ponchte huye bola
.
.
.
.
Kitne number se ?
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Drinkers Gang -
Aaj tab tak piyenge jab tak woh saamne wale 3 ped (trees) 6 nahi dikhte...
Bar tender- bas karo saalo, saamne 1 hi ped hai..!!
___________________________________
Daaru ki vajah se barbad ho chuke ek sharabi ne daaru na peene ki kasam li
or ghar se daru ki khali bottles baahar fekne laga..
Pehli fenk k bola- Teri vajah se meri naukri gayi.
2ri fenkte hue bola- Teri vajah se mera ghar bik gya.
3ri fenkte hue bola- Teri vajah se meri Biwi bachhe mujhe chhor k chale gaye.
4thi uthai to vo bhari hui nikli..
Use dekh k bola- Tu side me ho ja in sab me tera koi kasoor nahi hai...
____________________________
GOLU:Mere 3 bete Engineer ban Gye
Lekin ek kambakht DAKU ban Gya
MOLU:To usko ghar se nikal de
GOLU:Yahi to dikkat hai,kama kr wahi to lata hai.
_______________________________________
Ek intelligent ladka ladki ko kaise propose karega.Wo use boat me baitha kar jheel ke bich me le ja kar kahega Ya to I LOVE U bol nahi to mere boat se utar.
___________________________________________
Jab kavitri ki suhag raat k baad uski saheli ne pucha-Kaisi rahi suhagraat?
Woh boli-
"Aaye they wo der se,
Dil jala diya,
Pehle kiye kiwad band,
Fir deepak bhuja diya.
Pehle dabane lage
bobe tatolkar,
Fir khelne lage
chaddi khol kar.
Ek jung aisi chhidi palang par,
Gole wali top rakh di surang par,
Mila sirf 9 minute ka maja,
Ab bhogni hai 9 mahine ki saja.
9 mahine baad aisa hoga visfot,
Jo ban jayega Bharat ke liye
1 aur vote..":
_______________________________________
Ques:Mohabat ho Jati h Ya krni Padti h?
Ans:Ldki Sundar ho or Activa Pr ho to ho jati h..
Baddsurat ho or Honda City Pr ho to krni padti hai..
_____________________________
1 Hotel ME NEW married couple KE liye suggestion likha hua tha
"Khidki par parde dal dijye"
"Apka Pyar andha ho sakta HE,
Magar hamara staff nahi.
______________________________
@Eldest Son-Dad meri GF pregnant ho gayi hai
50,000 maang rahi hai chup rehne ke
Dad slaps him n pays him
2 months passed
2nd son-Meri Gf pregnant hai & demanding Rs.75,000
Dad slaps & pays him
Aftr 6 months,
Unmarried Daughter-
Dad I'm pregnant
Dad kisses her n said-
Ab paise lene ki hamari bari hai.@
______________________________________
A JUMBO SARDAR STORY---
4 sardaro ne mil k ptrl pump khola. 1 b custmr nai aya Q?
ptrl pmp was on 1st flor
fir charo ne usi flor pe rstornt khola. 1 b custmr nai Q?
ptrol pmp ka bord nai hataya
fir charo ne 1 taxi li.1 b swari nai.Q?
2 srdar age n 2 piche baith k swari dhund rhe the.
Txi kharab ho gyi.Charo ne khub dhakka lgaya bt txi whi ki whi.Q?
2 aage se n 2 piche se dhakka de rhe the.
Fir charo ne 1 bchhe ko kidnap kiya.
Bachhe ko kaha apne bap se 5 lac rs le k aa wrna tuje mar denge.
Bchha ghar gya aur uske papa ne paise de b diye. Q?
bchhe ka bap b srdar tha...!:
______________________________________
ek ort thi jiske 3 bcche the
or ek admi jiske bhi 3 bcche the.
dono me pyar huaa or phir un dono ke tin bcche hue
ek din vo admi kisi kam se bahr gya.
to uski bb ka phon aaya vo boli:
aji apke bcche or mere bcche milkr hmare bccho ko mar rhe he.
_________________________________
Saas ne apne sab Jawaiyo ki mahobbat aazmane ke liye un ke saamne dariya me chalaang laga di.
Pehle Jawai ne usse baccha liya,
usse Saas ki taraf se Car mil gayi...
2nd day yahi drama hua.
2nd Jawai ne bhi baccha liya,
usse Motorcycle inaam me mili,
3rd day repeated,
3rd Jawai ne socha ki mere liye to ab Cycle hi reh gayi hai.
Kya zarurat hai bachaane ki.
Saas doob gyi.
Agle din us Jawai ko Mercedes mil gayi.
Sasur ki taraf se...
__________________________________
Best traffic ADD of d year:
Picture of Lord GANESHA holding a helmet with a saying:
"Take Care of your head. Not everyone gets a replacement like me"!!
________________________________
1 ladke ki shadi nahi ho rahi thi, wo mannat mangne gaya.
Waha uski ma khai me gir gayi. Wo bola-Ya khuda teri Khudai, Apni to Mili nahi Bapu Ki bhi Gawai..
__________________________________________________
New style of proposiNg:
Boy-CaN u pose for a photo?
Girl-Why?
Boy-Just waNted to show my childreN how their mom looked iN her youNger days.,:-)
______________________________________
Hello Bhaiya, Rakhi Bhej Di Hai,
Umeed Hai Rakhi Mil Gayi Hogi
Mera Cell Kharab Hai Isliye Mai Tuhare JIJU ke Cell Se sMs Kr Rhi Hu.
Tumhari Pyari Behan-
katrina kaif
Happy raksha bandhan
__________________________________
Sardar ghr aaya to sochne laga k kya khaas kaam karna h,
sochta raha
sochta raha
raat k 3 baje yaad aya k aaj to jaldi sona tha.
________________________________________
Ek hijre ne maje maje mein'I-PILL' tablet kha li..
Socho kya hua hoga?
Andar se aawaz aayi, "Aapke System Par Ye Suvidha Uplabdh Nahi Hai!
__________________________________
Rich man: Aaj mere paas 14 cars,18 bikes,4 bunglow,3 farmhouse hai,TUMHARE pAAs kya hai,
POOR man- Mere paAs Beta hai,
.
.
Aur
Jiski GF
teri beti Hai.
_____________________________________
luv story..1ce dere ws a guy n a gal in a gud relationship since 5yrs n luvd each othr. guy ws sincere n gal ws cute. bth wer happy..
1 day gal came 2 meet d guy n showd him her pink lenses...
he saw dem n ws surprised.. days passed n 1 day suddenly guy met wid n accident.. gal came 2 hospital n waited fr 37hours.. den doctor came out n told her, ''ur bf hs liquor in his heart..." gal ws shockd n ws nt able 2 think of d reasn...reasn was-
'PINK LENSES!!.
u knw,
'gulabi akhein jo teri dekhi sharaabi ye dil ho gaya!!:-D
I knw u wan 2 kil me 4 dis msg bt wat 2 do yar "I HATE LOVE STORIES"...
_____________________________________
Kabhi kabhi dil chahta h kuch aisa ho jye.......
Paper ho pr result na aye..
Clases ho pr teachr na aye..
Bus me baithe par collge n jaye..
Picnic jye or wapis na aye..
Hafte me 3 din ho or
fir sunday aye..
Sote rhe dinbhr,sham ko ghumne jae..
Hum bilkul na padhe or
pas ho jye..
Sb dost sath rhe or chuttiyan manae..
Jise chahte h dil se vo apna ho jae..
Barish me bhige or zor se gae..
Duniya ko bhul fir bacche ban jae..
Bheed se dur ek duniya banae..
Sari zindgi bas yu hi kat jae..
Kash ye sare sapne sach ho jye..
Kabhi kabhi dil chahta h kuch esa ho jaye......gud evng.
__________________________
Years ago
People sacrificing their
Frnds,Family,Fun,Food,Laughter,sleep & Other Joys of Life wer calld SAINTS
Now they r Calld RAS/ IAS ASPIRANTS! All d best.
__________________________________________
1 Aisi jagah batao jaha Aap jaisa Amir insan bi Katori lekar khada ho jata hai? Socho?
?
Golgappe wale k aage.:)
_________________________________
Height of disappointment :
A women realised after a long long search on google that....
PHILIP'S 21 inch..
is actually a TV !!
________________________________________
Neend jab b hame agosh me leti hai,
Aapka chehra nigaho me bas jata hai ekdam se hamari
ankhe khul jati hain Dil se bas ek awaz aati h.....MUMMY MUMMY BHOOT...
__________________________________________
Sardar ko sapne me kisi ladki ne chappal mari.... 2 din tak sardar apne 'BANK' nahi gaya ? kyuki bank me likha tha'hum aapke sapno ko hakikat me badal dange.
_______________________________________
Teacher:Santa 1 story sunao wid moral
Santa:Me uske ghar gya vo so rha tha
Fir vo mere ghar aya to main so rha tha
Moral: Jaisi Karni Vaisi Bharni
___________________________________________
.***. * 1 * .***.
ye lo 1/- ka coin & send me sms..
kanjusi ki bhi koi had hoti he..
or khabardar is 1 Rs. se toffe kharidi to..!
________________________________________
Macchar Bola Insan Se-Mat Maaro Hume Jaan Se,
Jung Chied Jaayegi ,Dushmani Badh Jayegi Maana Aap Me Junoon Hai,
Magar Humari Rago Me Bhi Aapka Hi Khoon h.
____________________________________________
1 Admi ko heart ki bimari thi.
Doctor ne namak na khane ki salah di..
Uski biwi hamesha uska khayal rakhne lgi..
Wo admi b bahot sawdhani rkhne laga..
Samay pe khana,sona,uthna,
Dr ki batai exercise karna, khane me namak bilkul na lena..
Regular or samay pe dawayi lena..
Par achanak 1 din subah wo admi bathroom k darwaje pe mara hua mila..
Sab hairan the ki itni sawdhani ke baad aisa kaise ho gya..?
Postmartam ki report aayi to pataa chala...
.
.
.
Uske Toothpaste me 'Namak' tha..
Kya aapke toothpaste me namak h...?:
______________________________________
H
A
AA A A A A A A A AA
AA A A
A
A
Aa
Aaa
Aaaa
HAAanchii.!!
SORRY!
Mosam kharab he.
Apna khyal rakhna .!...
_____________________________
Sardar n apni BHABHI ko Jaan Se Maar diya.
Logo n Pucha q Mara.?
Sardar-Mai jb b apne dosto se Puchta tha Ki Kis Se baat kr rhe ho Wo yhi kehte teri BHABHI Se..
_____________________________________
1 Sharabi Mar Rha Tha To Bhagwan PrakaT Hue aur Bole- Koi Antim ichcha?
Sharabi- Prabhu.. Agli Baar Aankh Chahe 1 Hi Dena, Par Liver 4 Dena..
__________________________________________
Santa:EK kala bulb dena.
Shopkeeper:BHAI sahab Kale bulb ka kya kroge?
Santa:O YAR dopahar me andhera krke sone ka maza hi kuch Aur hai...gm
____________________________________
Santa ki roti par se chuha gujar gaya
Snta: Ab me ye roti nhi khaunga
Banta: Kha le beta chuhe ne konsi chappale pahni hui thi
___________________________________
DHINCHAK: Shortcut Propose:-
Boy : Kya Mai Aap ka Address Jaan Sakta Hu?
Girl : Q
Boy :Ek Din Baraat Jo Leker Aani Hai
_________________________________
"Chuho" ka aatank to dekho.
h mG j pT j mA d j jtaJ m tj tg a C h hO tP
sara SMS kutar diya,varna bahut kuch likha tha aapki Tareef me..
___________________________________
Judwa bache Apne Kamre Me Bethe The,
1 Hans k Lot Pot ho Rha tha,
2nd Udaas Tha.
Baap:-Tum itna Q Hans Rhe Ho?
Beta-Mummy ne Dono baar isi ko Nehla Diya.
__________________________________________
SENDI ik ped pe chada.
Bandar ne pucha-Upar kyon aaya.
SENDI-Seb khane.
Bandar-Yeh aam ka ped hai.
SENDI-Pata hai seb sath laya hoon.
______________________________________
Boy to girl:Likhe jo KHAT tujhe
woh teri YAD me,
sare padh liye papa ne RAAT me,
sawera jab hua to JUTE pad gye
wo"FANAA"wale baal "GHAJNI" me badal gye.
_____________________________________
Limit of caring..
1 cheeti hathi k upar bethi thi ki ekdum se 1 najuk sa pull aya to cheeti boli..
'Janu cross kar loge ya main utru'..?
_____________________________________
Hrithik tried to compete with Rajnikant in dance..
Result: he is on wheel chair in guzaarish..!
______________________________________
In INDIA
70% of Girls Name Ends in"A"
20% of Girls Name Ends in"I"
If U Have Any Doubt Check With Ur Friend's Name
Wat a great research?
_____________________________________
1 Bar Gandhi Ji k Sar Pe 10 Baal Aaye...
Wo Naai k Pas Gaye Naai Ne Gusse Me Pucha...
CUT karu & ya
COUNT karu ?
Bapu Vinamrta Se Bole...
.
COLOUR kar Beta !!!
________________________________
Boss-Tum itne chote chote kapde Q phanti ho?
Secretry-kya karu sir itni salary me itne hi chote kapde aate h.
Boss-chalo aj se salary band..!!
____________________________
{3+3 = 8 }
Ye Kaise Hua ?
Sochiye !
Ha Ha Sochiye !
Dimagh Pe Zor Daliye!
Shabash.!
Or Sochye!
Nhi Pta?
Mai Bataun Kaise Hua.
GALTI se.
____________________________________
Girl-Ladka kaisa he?
Pandit-Ladka acha he, Enginering kiya he dikhne me film ka HERO lagta hai
Girl-Kaun si film ka hero?
PEEPLI LIVE
___________________________________
A girl in a card shop
Girl:Aisa Greeting Card hai kya jisme likha ho
"Tum hi mera pehla pyar ho"
Shopkepr:Hai
Girl:Thik hai 10 de do..
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_,--(*)-=:___/|
(._0___:="''""\| I:I:I
Apka SMS Lane K Liye Apna Private Helicopter Bheja hai
Itna Kharcha Kiya h Mene,Ab 2-4 Msg to Bhej do.
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Girl :- Meri mummy ko tum bahut pasand aaye h
SENDI(sharmatehuye)
:Kuch bhi ho mai shaadi tumse he karunga
aunty se kehna mujhe bhool jaye.
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Boy prpoz 2 grl:Ye Raat,Ye subah,ye Hawa,Ye Chand,Ye Ghatayen,Ye Nadia,Ye Kinare
Girl:Saale Propose Kr Rha H Ya Environmental Study padha rha hai. . .?
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What happens when a Sardarni delivers twins?
? ?
? ?
? ?
? ?
The Sardar does not sleep whole night thinking who is the father of second child!
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Ali k 4 bache hue.Naam rakhe yusuf ali,aasif ali,asraf ali,musaraf ali fir 5va or 6ta bacha hua to. Ali ki bivi ne unke naam rakhe...
BAS-KAR ALI
REHAM KAR ALI.
_______________________________________
)Ek pagal dusre pagal se-main tumko itni zor se thappad maruga k delhi jakar giro ge...dusra pagal-zara ahista marna mujhe gaziabad main kuch kaam hai..
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Boy:Me 5 Yrs Ka Hu,
Aur Tum?
Girl:Me 3 Yrs Ki Hu.Boy:Toh Fir Chal Na,
Shrmana Kya?
Girl : Kanha..??
?
?
?
?
?
?
Boy-Polio Ki Dva Pine.!
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Medam boy se- kahan h copy
kahan h pen?
boy- jabse tumhe dekha kya copy kya pen?
Tare mast-mast 2 nain
mere dil ka le gye chen
gayab h copy or kho gye pen!!
____________________________
Joke
Pehla Gadha-Malik Mujhe Maarta Hai, Doosra-To Bhag Jaa.
Pehla-Nahi Malik Ki Beti Roti Hai To Vo Kehta Hai Teri Shadi Kisi Gadhe Se Hi Karvaunga.
____________________________________
I Called U 5 Times...
But D Line was Busy,
So Pls Come
In ur balcony,
I'm
Outside
ur Home.
____________________________
1 Gadhe ne sardar ko lat mari.Sardar uske piche bhaga to raste me ZEBRA mila.Sardar usko lat mar k bola" Sale Night-Dress pahen k ullu banata hai"
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3 sardar picnic par gae whan ja kr yad aya k pepsi to ghar bhul gye Decide kia k sab se chota sardar ja kr pepsi le aye,
sardar:Main is shart par jata hu k tum mere ane tk smose nhi khaoge
Dono ne kaha thik hai
1 din guzr gya sardar ni aya
2 din guzr gae
2no ne socha k ab smose kha lne chahye
Jse hi smosa uthaya chota sardar ped k piche se nikal k bola.
Aise karoge to main nahi jaunga...
I'm"moon"
I Just Came 2 Say U....
''GOOD NIGHT''
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A Sardar In a B.E. Campus Interview : Hw does an electric motor run?
Sardar: dhuurrrrr..rr Interviewer Shouts : STOP IT ! Sardar : dhurr dhp dup dup dup.
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Plz msg me only between these timings:..
6am-11:59am, 12pm-3:59pm,
4pm-7:59pm,
8pm-5:59am.
remaining time I'm BUSY very seriously... pdai krni pdti h..;-)
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Mujhse kya galti ho gai?
Why r u avoidng me?
Atleast week mai 1 bar to yaad kar liya karo
Ur behavior is hurting me?
with love..
from-
ur bath Soap!
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CID enters SOUTH:
Rajnikant bole "YENNA RASCALA, MIND IT"
wah wah
Rajnikant bole "YENNA RASCALA MIND IT"
ACP-Abhijeet, lash yhi kahi h,FIND IT!!...:-
------------------------------------------------------------
This is to formally announce
that I have started accepting diwali gifts by
CASH, CHEQUES & CREDIT CARD etc.
To avoid last day rush, Send now!
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Your Eyes.. Patakha.
Your Smile.. Roket.
Your Body.. Fuljhari.
Your Style.. Anaar.
Your Personality..Bomb.
ab bolo MSg.karoge ya Machis jalaun..?
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Sardar: ye TV ka rate Kya hai?
Salesman: 1 lakh rupees.
Sardar: why anythin Special?
Sal: Light chali gayi to Automatic off ho Jayega.
Sardar: oho, pack it.
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Ramlila se Hanuman tha Farar,Roll k liye fit kiya 1 Sardar.Sardar tha bahut hi kamal, Ped se Chalang mar k bola-Jo bole so Nlhal, Sita darling Sastriya kaal.
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Yaar 1ladki muje bahut tang kr rhi h
pta nhi usko mera no. kaha se mila
jab b kisi ko cal kro bech me aakr khti h
PLZ RECHARGE UR ACCOUNT
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Santa Ko Electric Chair Par Bitha Kar Electric Curent Se Maut Ki Saza Sunai.
jailer-Akhri Khwahish Kya Hai?
Santa-Mujhe Dar Lag Raha Hai Mera Hath PakAd lo.
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Sardar fixed his marriage on 2nd march.
He sent invitation 2 his friends like this
"Marriage is on march 2nd.
Plz come on 1st night. we all will enjoy"...
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Santa tharmos le k picnic pe gaya. Santa:Is me thandi cheez thandi,
or garm cheez garm rhti h
Banta:Tum is me kya laye ho?
Santa:4 kulfi aur 2 cup Chai.
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Ek raat 2 baje bahut tez barish ho rahi thi.
santa ne ek aadmi ke ghar ka darwaza khatkaya aur puchha Dhakka laga doge kya?please.
Aadmi neend me tha isiliye mana kar ke andar aa gaya par use guilty feel hui.socha barish me koi meri madad na karta to?
Woh utha aur bahar jakar bola-santa kya tumhe abhi dhakke ki zarurat hai?
Awaz aayi -HAAN.
Aadmi:-Thik hai santa, tum ho kahan?
Santa bola "YAHAN GARDEN ME JHULE PAR" :-)
________________________________
#Doctor to Santa: #Aapki ek kidney fail ho gayi hai.
#Santa pehle to bahut roya, Fir aansu ponchte huye bola
.
.
.
.
Kitne number se ?
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Drinkers Gang -
Aaj tab tak piyenge jab tak woh saamne wale 3 ped (trees) 6 nahi dikhte...
Bar tender- bas karo saalo, saamne 1 hi ped hai..!!
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Daaru ki vajah se barbad ho chuke ek sharabi ne daaru na peene ki kasam li
or ghar se daru ki khali bottles baahar fekne laga..
Pehli fenk k bola- Teri vajah se meri naukri gayi.
2ri fenkte hue bola- Teri vajah se mera ghar bik gya.
3ri fenkte hue bola- Teri vajah se meri Biwi bachhe mujhe chhor k chale gaye.
4thi uthai to vo bhari hui nikli..
Use dekh k bola- Tu side me ho ja in sab me tera koi kasoor nahi hai...
____________________________
GOLU:Mere 3 bete Engineer ban Gye
Lekin ek kambakht DAKU ban Gya
MOLU:To usko ghar se nikal de
GOLU:Yahi to dikkat hai,kama kr wahi to lata hai.
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Ek intelligent ladka ladki ko kaise propose karega.Wo use boat me baitha kar jheel ke bich me le ja kar kahega Ya to I LOVE U bol nahi to mere boat se utar.
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Jab kavitri ki suhag raat k baad uski saheli ne pucha-Kaisi rahi suhagraat?
Woh boli-
"Aaye they wo der se,
Dil jala diya,
Pehle kiye kiwad band,
Fir deepak bhuja diya.
Pehle dabane lage
bobe tatolkar,
Fir khelne lage
chaddi khol kar.
Ek jung aisi chhidi palang par,
Gole wali top rakh di surang par,
Mila sirf 9 minute ka maja,
Ab bhogni hai 9 mahine ki saja.
9 mahine baad aisa hoga visfot,
Jo ban jayega Bharat ke liye
1 aur vote..":
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Ques:Mohabat ho Jati h Ya krni Padti h?
Ans:Ldki Sundar ho or Activa Pr ho to ho jati h..
Baddsurat ho or Honda City Pr ho to krni padti hai..
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1 Hotel ME NEW married couple KE liye suggestion likha hua tha
"Khidki par parde dal dijye"
"Apka Pyar andha ho sakta HE,
Magar hamara staff nahi.
______________________________
@Eldest Son-Dad meri GF pregnant ho gayi hai
50,000 maang rahi hai chup rehne ke
Dad slaps him n pays him
2 months passed
2nd son-Meri Gf pregnant hai & demanding Rs.75,000
Dad slaps & pays him
Aftr 6 months,
Unmarried Daughter-
Dad I'm pregnant
Dad kisses her n said-
Ab paise lene ki hamari bari hai.@
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A JUMBO SARDAR STORY---
4 sardaro ne mil k ptrl pump khola. 1 b custmr nai aya Q?
ptrl pmp was on 1st flor
fir charo ne usi flor pe rstornt khola. 1 b custmr nai Q?
ptrol pmp ka bord nai hataya
fir charo ne 1 taxi li.1 b swari nai.Q?
2 srdar age n 2 piche baith k swari dhund rhe the.
Txi kharab ho gyi.Charo ne khub dhakka lgaya bt txi whi ki whi.Q?
2 aage se n 2 piche se dhakka de rhe the.
Fir charo ne 1 bchhe ko kidnap kiya.
Bachhe ko kaha apne bap se 5 lac rs le k aa wrna tuje mar denge.
Bchha ghar gya aur uske papa ne paise de b diye. Q?
bchhe ka bap b srdar tha...!:
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ek ort thi jiske 3 bcche the
or ek admi jiske bhi 3 bcche the.
dono me pyar huaa or phir un dono ke tin bcche hue
ek din vo admi kisi kam se bahr gya.
to uski bb ka phon aaya vo boli:
aji apke bcche or mere bcche milkr hmare bccho ko mar rhe he.
_________________________________
Saas ne apne sab Jawaiyo ki mahobbat aazmane ke liye un ke saamne dariya me chalaang laga di.
Pehle Jawai ne usse baccha liya,
usse Saas ki taraf se Car mil gayi...
2nd day yahi drama hua.
2nd Jawai ne bhi baccha liya,
usse Motorcycle inaam me mili,
3rd day repeated,
3rd Jawai ne socha ki mere liye to ab Cycle hi reh gayi hai.
Kya zarurat hai bachaane ki.
Saas doob gyi.
Agle din us Jawai ko Mercedes mil gayi.
Sasur ki taraf se...
__________________________________
Best traffic ADD of d year:
Picture of Lord GANESHA holding a helmet with a saying:
"Take Care of your head. Not everyone gets a replacement like me"!!
________________________________
1 ladke ki shadi nahi ho rahi thi, wo mannat mangne gaya.
Waha uski ma khai me gir gayi. Wo bola-Ya khuda teri Khudai, Apni to Mili nahi Bapu Ki bhi Gawai..
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New style of proposiNg:
Boy-CaN u pose for a photo?
Girl-Why?
Boy-Just waNted to show my childreN how their mom looked iN her youNger days.,:-)
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Hello Bhaiya, Rakhi Bhej Di Hai,
Umeed Hai Rakhi Mil Gayi Hogi
Mera Cell Kharab Hai Isliye Mai Tuhare JIJU ke Cell Se sMs Kr Rhi Hu.
Tumhari Pyari Behan-
katrina kaif
Happy raksha bandhan
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Sardar ghr aaya to sochne laga k kya khaas kaam karna h,
sochta raha
sochta raha
raat k 3 baje yaad aya k aaj to jaldi sona tha.
________________________________________
Ek hijre ne maje maje mein'I-PILL' tablet kha li..
Socho kya hua hoga?
Andar se aawaz aayi, "Aapke System Par Ye Suvidha Uplabdh Nahi Hai!
__________________________________
Rich man: Aaj mere paas 14 cars,18 bikes,4 bunglow,3 farmhouse hai,TUMHARE pAAs kya hai,
POOR man- Mere paAs Beta hai,
.
.
Aur
Jiski GF
teri beti Hai.
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luv story..1ce dere ws a guy n a gal in a gud relationship since 5yrs n luvd each othr. guy ws sincere n gal ws cute. bth wer happy..
1 day gal came 2 meet d guy n showd him her pink lenses...
he saw dem n ws surprised.. days passed n 1 day suddenly guy met wid n accident.. gal came 2 hospital n waited fr 37hours.. den doctor came out n told her, ''ur bf hs liquor in his heart..." gal ws shockd n ws nt able 2 think of d reasn...reasn was-
'PINK LENSES!!.
u knw,
'gulabi akhein jo teri dekhi sharaabi ye dil ho gaya!!:-D
I knw u wan 2 kil me 4 dis msg bt wat 2 do yar "I HATE LOVE STORIES"...
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Kabhi kabhi dil chahta h kuch aisa ho jye.......
Paper ho pr result na aye..
Clases ho pr teachr na aye..
Bus me baithe par collge n jaye..
Picnic jye or wapis na aye..
Hafte me 3 din ho or
fir sunday aye..
Sote rhe dinbhr,sham ko ghumne jae..
Hum bilkul na padhe or
pas ho jye..
Sb dost sath rhe or chuttiyan manae..
Jise chahte h dil se vo apna ho jae..
Barish me bhige or zor se gae..
Duniya ko bhul fir bacche ban jae..
Bheed se dur ek duniya banae..
Sari zindgi bas yu hi kat jae..
Kash ye sare sapne sach ho jye..
Kabhi kabhi dil chahta h kuch esa ho jaye......gud evng.
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Years ago
People sacrificing their
Frnds,Family,Fun,Food,Laughter,sleep & Other Joys of Life wer calld SAINTS
Now they r Calld RAS/ IAS ASPIRANTS! All d best.
__________________________________________
1 Aisi jagah batao jaha Aap jaisa Amir insan bi Katori lekar khada ho jata hai? Socho?
?
Golgappe wale k aage.:)
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Height of disappointment :
A women realised after a long long search on google that....
PHILIP'S 21 inch..
is actually a TV !!
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