STUDENT TEACHER JOKES





Teacher-Bus k Driver aur

conductor me kya fark Hai?

Student-Conductor soya to kisi ka

ticket Nahi katega

&

Driver soya to sabka ticket cut

jaega..gn
__________________________________________________________

TRY THIS MAGIC MATHS...

13837 x Ur Age x 73 = ?

Age k 4 tukde na ho jaye to mera naam badal dena...

It's REALLY INTERSTING...

Try it.
___________________________________________________________
BETA:- papa meri teacher kitni pyari hai na.! 


 SANTA:Beta teacher MAA ke barabar hoti hai.

 BETA:Aap to hamesha apne hi setting me rehte ho..!
________________________________________________________________
Teacher-Bus k Driver aur

conductor me kya fark Hai?

Student-Conductor soya to kisi ka

ticket Nahi katega

&

Driver soya to sabka ticket cut

jaega..gn
________________________________________________
Teacher to student:art ki copy pe sab train banao me 5min me aarhi hu
 10min bad
 T:train dikao
 Stu:aap late ho ge train 5min phle chali gai..gm
_________________________________________________
Good Night In COMMERCE Style:
 Rest A/c Dr.
 Swt Drems A/c Dr. To Tension A/c
 (Being comfort received and tension removed)
_________________________________________________-

Wat is education...?
 Education is a process of wasting half of our life to learn how to waste remaining half of our life.. ALBERT EINSTEIN.
________________________________________________--
A good teachr is one,who tel u to study hard.

But a best teacher is one,who stand outside d exam hal & shout "O kamino!!! flying aa gayi,parchiya chupa do."
__________________________________________________________
Brilliance Proved:
 Teacher: Which Was 1st Silent Film In Hindi?
 Stud: If d Film Was Silent,
 How Could u Know It Was Hindi?
 Teacher shocks!!!
 Student rocks....
_________________________________________________________
Teacher:Santa 1 story sunao wid moral

Santa:Me uske ghar gya vo so rha tha

Fir vo mere ghar aya to main so rha tha

Moral: Jaisi Karni Vaisi Bharni
________________________________________________

Education related songs:

SCHOOL- Apni to paatshala masti ki pathshala.

TUTION- Idhar chala mai udhar chala.

MATHS- Ajeeb dastan hai ye

kaha shuru kaha khatam.

SCIENCE- Aa khusi se kudkushi karle.

GEOGRAPHY- Musafir hoon main yaaro.
 
ECONOMICS-Kyu paisa paisa karti hai, kyu paise pe tu marti hai.

EXAM- Zehrelein raatey

ninde udd jati hai.
_________________________________________________

Kya Bnane Aye The Kya Bna Bethe,

Khi Mandir Bna Bethe,Khi Mszid Bna Bethe,

Hum Se To Jaat Achchi H Parindo Ki,

Kabhi Mandir Pe Ja Bethe Kabhi Mszid Pe Ja Bethe.
_____________________________________________

To, The Principal, Govt School, PUNJAB.

Sir,

Gal eh hai ki school vich sada dil nahi lagda,

te raat nu neend nahi aandi,

kyonki school vich kudiyan ghat rai hai,

te saadi class vich 1 vi nahi hai, jo aur class vich hai o sab enni sugali han ki dekhan nu ji ni karda.

Nakhre asman pe han.

Te Madam v koi khaas pataka nahi hai kuch ni to tenu kam se kam 4 sohni

kaam-valiyan hi rakh lawo.

 Aap nu bahut kripa howani. danywad.

________________________________________________________
Teacher 2 student-homewrk kyun ni kiya?

Stdnt-sir,lyt nahi ti.

Teachr-toh mombatti jala leta.

Stu-sir,maachis ni ti.

Teachr-kyu?

Stu-puja ghar me rkhi ti.

Teachr-toh le aata.

Stu-nahaya ni tha sir.

Teachr-nahaya kyu ni tha?:-@

stu-paani ni tha sir

teachr-arey,pani kyu ni tha?

Stu-sir motor ni chal ri ti.

Teachr-huh,huh.ab motor ko kya hua kamine?

Stu-sir kitni bar bolu lyt nahi thi.;-)
_______________________________________________________
Teacher: bachcho tum sabse zyada kisse nafrat karte ho. 

KG Boy: Rajaram Mohan Roy Teacher: Oh God!! Unhi se Kyu. 

KG Boy:us sale ne BAL VIVAH khatm karwa diya.
_______________________________________________________
Leave Appl.

oh my teacher! when i come rain start chum chum.

leg my phisla gira mai dham bag was neeche uper was hum isliye for 2days I cant come
_____________________________________________________


Q.Rajput per ek nibandh likho ?ANS."RAJPUT" EK ajeeb prani h. Ye Rajasthan ki bhumi pe paye jate h. Navratri k din ye bhaari sankhya me dekhne ko milte h.,DARU BAKRA MEET hi inka poustik aahar h. ENHE RAAJ KARNA aata h. Janm lene k 16 saal tak KUNWAR SA h., 18 saal k baad BANNA bhayankar rup dharan kar lete h.,10 PM ke baad inke nikat nhi jana chaiye ,kyuki ye hanikark sidh ho sakte h.,ye bade hoke TALWAAR,GOLIYAN chalane ka kaam karte h .BANNA THARI LAL PILI ANKHEYA KA gana sunke ye kahi bhi nachne lgte h .Ab SINGI IS KING inka national song ho gaya h.
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In future how wil i identify ur kids in class room? 

i wil jst check who is erasing his notes whn d teacher is cleaning d board & i wil knw d legend is back.
________________________________________________________________


Q. Prove 2/10=2.



Arts stdnt:"its out of syllabus"



Engenrng & science stdnt:"ye prblm hi galat ha"



Medical:"its starange!!ye kaise hoga?"



commrc:"its so simple n easy..

i.e.

Two/Ten=

wo/en (T cancel)



w=23rd letter,

o=15

/

e=5,n=14

so, 23+15/5+14=

=38/19=2 Ans

Commrce studt nvr ask ans kya hai,dey only ask ans kya lana hai?

DATS Commrc stdnts skil

Proud 2b a comrce stdnt..!!
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A beggar found 100Rs

He decided 2 have a gr8 dinner!

He went 2 a 5* Hotel n enjoyed the dinner

When bill came he said I ve no money!

Manager called police & handed the beggar over 2 them!

The beggar gave Rs 100 to policeman & he was set free! ;-)

This is...



"FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT "indeed..!
________________________________________________
 A nice Letter by a little Kid who hates Maths: 

"Dear Maths, please grow up soon & try to solve ur own problems. 

Don't depend on others..!!"
________________________________________________
Education related songs:

SCHOOL- Apni to paatshala masti ki pathshala.

TUTION- Idhar chala mai udhar chala.

MATHS- Ajeeb dastan hai ye

kaha shuru kaha khatam.



SCIENCE- Aa khusi se kudkushi karle.



GEOGRAPHY- Musafir hoon main yaaro.



ECONOMICS-Kyu paisa paisa karti hai, kyu paise pe tu marti hai.

EXAM- Zehrelein raatey

ninde udd jati hai.



RESULT- Jiya dhadak dhadak jaye.



PASS- Aaj mai upar asman niche.

FAIL- Jag suna suna laage.......

CHILDREN JOKES





A Kid On His Way 2 Home With His Mom Saw A Couple Kissing On The Road, 

He Said: Look Mom look,that boy n girl r Fighting For A Chewing GUM..
______________________________________________________________________________


GOD ASKED,

"What is forgiveness?"

 A little boy sendi gave luvly reply...

"It is the wonderful fruit that a tree gives when it is being hurt by a stone..."
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A kid asked Swami Vivekanand:

Sab Kuch Khone Se Zyada Bura Kya h?

He Replied:

Wo umeed Khona jiske Bharose Par hum Sab Kuch Vapas Paa Sakte h
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BETA:- papa meri teacher kitni pyari hai na.! SANTA:Beta teacher MAA ke barabar hoti hai. BETA:Aap to hamesha apne hi setting me rehte ho..!

.____________________________________________________
GOD ASKED,

"What is forgiveness?"

A little boy sendi gave luvly reply...

"It is the wonderful fruit that a tree gives when it is being hurt by a stone..."
______________________________________________

Ek bar hanuman Ji ne Ravan k Garden me bahut shor machaya to Ravan ka Beta Meghnath aya aur bola-
 

.

.

.

Volume Kam Kr, Pappa Jag Jayega
________________________________________________________________________

A nice Letter by a little Kid who hates Maths: 

"Dear Maths, please grow up soon & try to solve ur own problems. 

Don't depend on others..!!"
_________________________________________________
Boy:Me 5 Yrs Ka Hu,

Aur Tum?

Girl:Me 3 Yrs Ki Hu.Boy:Toh Fir Chal Na,

Shrmana Kya?

Girl : Kanha..??

?

 ?

?

?

?

 ?
 Boy-Polio Ki Dva Pine.!
________________________________________



Ek student ne MBA ka form bharte hue paas khade chaukidar se puchha : kaisa hai college? chaukidar:-bahut badhiya Hai, hamne khud yahi se MBA kia hai..:
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CUTE LINES BY A CHILD 2 HIS MOTHER=
 Mom i luv u
 more thn u luv me.
 Mother=How can u tell this?
 Sn=Coz u hav
 2 Sons
 but i hav only
 1 mother.
_______________________________________________________________



I MISS U..

Lekin pta hai miss to skul mei hoti hai.

Skul mei to bache hote hai.

Bache to chote hote hai.

Choti to chiriya hoti hai.

Chidiya to udti hai.

Udta to kawwa bhi hai.

Kawwa to kaala hota hai.

Kaali to billi bi hoti hai.

Billi to sher ki khala hai.

Sher to jungle mei rehta hai.

Jungle mei to haathi bhi rehta hai.

Hathi to bahut bda hota hai.

Bda to samandar bhi hai.

Samandar to neela hota hai.

Neela to asmaan bhi hota hai.

Asmaan par to taare hote hai.

Taare to chmakte bhi hai.

Chmakta to heera bhi hai.

Heera to mehnga hota hai.

Mehnga to sona hota hai.

Sona to raat ko hota hai.

Raat ke baad toh subah hoti hai.

Subah to naashta krte hai.

Nashte mei to anda hota hai.

Anda 2 rang ka hota hai.

2 rang ka toh zebra bhi hota hai.

Zebra to ghode jaisa hota hai.

Ghoda toh tanga chlata hai.

Taange par bache skul jate hai.

Skul me to miss hoti he.

Miss se yaad aaya..

I MISS U...
____________________________________________



ma: beta khana khale.

beta: nhi

ma: tofi khale.

beta: nhi

ma: ice cream kale.

beta: nhi

ma: pizza khale.

beta: nhi

ma: samose khale.

beta: nhi
 ma: bilkul apne bap pr gya he...

thappr kha ke hi manega.
_________________________________________



DAD: BETA 1 GLASS PANI LANA 

SON: NAHI LAUNGA

2nd SON : REHNE DO DAD YE TO HAI HI BADTAMIZ AAP KHUD HI LELO AUR MERE LIYE BHI LETE AANA-
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ek ort thi jiske 3 bcche the

or ek admi jiske bhi 3 bcche the.

dono me pyar huaa or phir un dono ke tin bcche hue 

ek din vo admi kisi kam se bahr gya.

to uski bb ka phon aaya vo boli:

aji apke bcche or mere bcche milkr hmare bccho ko mar rhe he.

____________________________________________________
।। नटखट बनसी वाले 

गोकुल के राजा 

मेरी आँखिया तरस गई

अब तो आजा ।। 

जन्म आष्टमी के पावन

आवसर तक इस SMS को इतना फैलाय जितना

आपको ।। कानहा जी ।। से प्रेम है ।।

।। राधे राधे ।।
__________________________


BACHPAN KA ZAMANA HOTA THA.

Khushiyo ka khazana hota tha.

Chahat chaand ko pane ki,

dil titli ka diwana hota tha.

Khabar na thi kuch subah ki,

na shaamo ka thikana hota tha.

Thak-haar k aana school se

par khelne b jana hota tha

Dadi ki kahani hoti thi

pariyo ka fasana hota tha

Barish me kagaz ki kashti thi

Har mausam suhana hota tha

Har khel me sathi hote the

Har rishta nibhana hota tha

Papa ki wo daate galti par

Mummy ka manana hota tha

Gam ki juban na hoti thi

na jakhmo ka paimana hota tha

Rone ki wajah na hoti thi

na hasne ka bahana hota tha

Ab nahi rhi wo zindgi...jaisa BACHPAN KA ZAMANA HOTA THA.
_____________________________________________________



In future how wil i identify ur kids in class room?


 i wil jst check who is erasing his notes whn d teacher is cleaning d board & i wil knw d legend is back.
____________________________________________________________


The next Generation KG Poem-
 
Drinking Drinkng little BEER,
 How i wonder which BAR is near,
 Quarter rates r up so HIGH.
 Drink a peg with chicken Fry.


_____________________________________
1 day GOD asked me,4 hw long do u need dis luvly frnd with u? 

I just dropped a single drop of water into an ocean n told''UNTIL U FIND THIS.


__________________________________

"REALITY OF LIFE"

Everything is valuable only

- before getting it.. and

- after loosing it..!
________________________________

'God Bless You'

is such a little prayer but it means so much.

It means - may Lord with His gracious hands, give u more than u have prayed for..! 

Good Morning
______________________________

When U feel sad, go infront of mirror,Luk at urself & sy I am so cute.

U'll smile automatically..:-)

Bt don't mke it a habit

Bcoz..

roz roz mzak acha n hota h.!

___________________________________


Best msg from Bhagvat Gita:

Your mind is your great friend if you control it

But Your mind is your greatest enemy if it controls you.....

______________________________ 
  

Some People In Life

Are A Part Of You

And Even When You

Let Them Go

You Never Lose Them

Bcoz You Find The Memories 

Of Time

Spent Together

Still Living In You

_____________________________


THE SWEETNESS OF CHOCOLATE REMAINS IN TONGUE FOR SOMETIMES 
BUT THE SWEETNESS AND LOVE OF A PERSON LIKE U 
REMAINS IN HEART FOR EVER AND EVER..GOOD MORNING

_______________________________


A famous poet says..

It is possible to cross an ocean without wetting legs...,

But it is impossible to cross the life without wetting the eyes.!!

_____________________________ 


Great line said by Shahid Bhagat Singh: "Zindagi to apne damm par hi ji jati he, Dusro ke Kandho par to sirf Janaaze Utha karte he" belive in Urself. Gud mrng.

___________________________________ 

   When it rains all birds fly for shelter.But eagle avoids the rain by flying above the clouds.

Problm is common to all,bt ATTITUDE makes the difference

______________________________


"Change is the nature of life but challenge is the future of life. So challenge the changes. Never change the challenges.." 

_______________________________ 


Best Motivating Lines: "Waiting to Win is Common to all But Working to Win is Style of a Champion! Be a Champion & Win the World."

______________________________ 


 A knowledgeable person makes u realize how wonderful d world is... But its only a loving person who makes u realize how wonderful U r in d world.
_________________________________
 
~ % ~ LOVE IS LIKE "WAR"EASY TO START HARD TO END 'N'IMPOSSIBLE TO FORGETSO DON'T LOVE " ANYONE " ~ % ~

__________________________________


Genius & Successful people Dont Relax in Chairs, 

They Relax in Work, They Sleep with Dreams, 
& Awake with Determination & Commitment. 

___________________________________


SLEEP s a languag of rest.


SLEEP s a way2relax

SLEEP s2visualise our drmz

SLEEP improvs Ur mental ability

So hv a Nice SLEEP
___________________________

If the 1st buton in a shirt is put wrong, Then Every Buton will be wrong,

So Alwys take ur 1st step carefully in whatever you do to achieve your goal...



__________________________



BACHPAN KA ZAMANA HOTA THA.


Khushiyo ka khazana hota tha.

Chahat chaand ko pane ki,

dil titli ka diwana hota tha.

Khabar na thi kuch subah ki,

na shaamo ka thikana hota tha.

Thak-haar k aana school se

par khelne b jana hota tha

Dadi ki kahani hoti thi

pariyo ka fasana hota tha

Barish me kagaz ki kashti thi


Har mausam suhana hota tha

Har khel me sathi hote the

Har rishta nibhana hota tha

Papa ki wo daate galti par

Mummy ka manana hota tha

Gam ki juban na hoti thi

na jakhmo ka paimana hota tha

Rone ki wajah na hoti thi

na hasne ka bahana hota tha

Ab nahi rhi wo zindgi...jaisa BACHPAN KA ZAMANA HOTA THA.
_____________________________________________________




In future how wil i identify ur kids in class room?



 i wil jst check who is erasing his notes whn d teacher is cleaning d board & i wil knw d legend is back.
____________________________________________________________

The next Generation KG Poem-
Drinking Drinkng little BEER,
 How i wonder which BAR is near,
 Quarter rates r up so HIGH.
 Drink a peg with chicken Fry.



___________________________________

1 day GOD asked me,4 hw long do u need dis luvly frnd with u? 



I just dropped a single drop of water into an ocean n told''UNTIL U FIND THIS.

__________________________________





"REALITY OF LIFE"



Everything is valuable only



- before getting it.. and



- after loosing it..!

________________________________



'God Bless You'



is such a little prayer but it means so much.



It means - may Lord with His gracious hands, give u more than u have prayed for..! 



Good Morning

______________________________



When U feel sad, go infront of mirror,Luk at urself & sy I am so cute.



U'll smile automatically..:-)



Bt don't mke it a habit



Bcoz..



roz roz mzak acha n hota h.!



___________________________________




Best msg from Bhagvat Gita:


Your mind is your great friend if you control it



But Your mind is your greatest enemy if it controls you.....



______________________________ 

  

Some People In Life

Are A Part Of You

And Even When You

Let Them Go

You Never Lose Them

Bcoz You Find The Memories 

Of Time

Spent Together

Still Living In You

_____________________________


THE SWEETNESS OF CHOCOLATE REMAINS IN TONGUE FOR SOMETIMES 
BUT THE SWEETNESS AND LOVE OF A PERSON LIKE U 
REMAINS IN HEART FOR EVER AND EVER..GOOD MORNING

_______________________________


A famous poet says..

It is possible to cross an ocean without wetting legs...,

But it is impossible to cross the life without wetting the eyes.!!

_____________________________ 


Great line said by Shahid Bhagat Singh: "Zindagi to apne damm par hi ji jati he, Dusro ke Kandho par to sirf Janaaze Utha karte he" belive in Urself. Gud mrng.

___________________________________ 

   When it rains all birds fly for shelter.But eagle avoids the rain by flying above the clouds.

Problm is common to all,bt ATTITUDE makes the difference

______________________________


"Change is the nature of life but challenge is the future of life. So challenge the changes. Never change the challenges.." 

_______________________________ 


Best Motivating Lines: "Waiting to Win is Common to all But Working to Win is Style of a Champion! Be a Champion & Win the World."

______________________________ 


 A knowledgeable person makes u realize how wonderful d world is... But its only a loving person who makes u realize how wonderful U r in d world.
_________________________________
~ % ~ LOVE IS LIKE "WAR"EASY TO START HARD TO END 'N'IMPOSSIBLE TO FORGETSO DON'T LOVE " ANYONE " ~ % ~

__________________________________


Genius & Successful people Dont Relax in Chairs, 
They Relax in Work, They Sleep with Dreams, 
& Awake with Determination & Commitment. 

___________________________________

SLEEP s a languag of rest.


SLEEP s a way2relax

SLEEP s2visualise our drmz

SLEEP improvs Ur mental ability

So hv a Nice SLEEP
___________________________

If the 1st buton in a shirt is put wrong, Then Every Buton will be wrong,

So Alwys take ur 1st step carefully in whatever you do to achieve your goal...

__________________________